I think way too much. 

If my blog posts aren't evident enough of that then, CONFESSION: I think too much.

Sometimes I wonder if I don't think any more than the next person. That we're all just a bunch of thinkers but don't voice it. I know that we always seem to have some streaming thought going on in our head, according to some show I watched years ago. 

But to contemplate, to really consider certain things, including the pointless things, until you've either got it down to a science or tire of it, I wonder how much of that we all, as a whole, really do.

I wonder this because I have had mental battles, wars, while sitting amongst a quiet group of friends. Where I think something and then debate it, or view it from another angle, debate that and then go back to my first thought before the debate to start fresh. I will then look over at a friend, remember something I needed to ask her, to which it interrupts the organized chaos that is raging in my head and suddenly my mind is now an eight semi-truck pile up all thanks to the 1998 Dodge Neon that cut everyone off.

One gal I'm subscribed to uploaded a video and in it, she was frustrated. She ranted about other YouTubers, one in particular, but how a lot of them are "fake" while screaming to their viewers that they should be themselves. She also talked about the demands these people have and the difficulty of that to post videos on a regular basis to meet the expectations of their viewers. 

This video had me coming to a screeching halt while applying my makeup. I took a look at myself in the mirror, wondering with that over-thinking brain of mine, how much her rant could very well apply to me. 

And I did a video on it. Because I want you, my favorite people in the world, to know what my response is and I think it's only fair to finally tell you what you should expect from me. 

Easter, kickin' it old school video games, and silly kiddos! Come and see what's gone on over here the last month!

I love the attention to details my readers and viewers have! In my video where I talk about how I dyed my hair I made mention that I did it on a special day. Well, my sweet friend Tammy noted, "But, you didn't tell us what you were celebrating!"

Well Tammy, this one is for you!

I have been so far out of the dating loop I am not even going to attempt to admit that I am an expert in it.

But I do feel like I know how one should be treated in a relationship. I have seen time and again relationships that have been on the rocks either lead to a stronger bond, or having both parties go their separate ways.

I am one who likes to look at situations/friendships/relationships, anything that involves two people, from the perspective of both of those people. I observe what makes two people work together like clockwork, or push against each other like grinding gears.

But most importantly, I have learned that between each story where a relationship has failed, there is a fine line called "The Truth".

So when my friend wrote me, a friend I've known for a while, a friend that has confided a lot in me about his dating woes, his insecurities in finding and keeping a relationship, and how it looks like his latest "girlfriend" is following suit in this history of his, I could no longer bite my tongue.

I did something and told no one about it. 

Other than ONE trusted friend, my family that lives with me as they know my every move. And my neighbor, who happened to catch me in the act. But no one else knew.

And now that's it been a while, I decided to share it with you. To come clean, to confess what I've been hiding.

Watch and see what that is.

I recently experienced the ever popular statement of "I no longer recognize myself in the mirror". 

Because I still see myself as this:

(Ladee's Senior Picture)

My face was so youthful, so line-less, so smooth. I was constantly mistaken as being my younger sister's age while everyone assumed she was my age.

How I hated that.

"Just wait, Ladee," Mom would tell me, "when you're in your thirties everyone will think you're in your twenties!"

And while I still beam brighter than noonday sun when I hear strangers, new friends, and even my kids' friends say that I look like I'm 21, I know how I used to look and I want to stop, at all costs, the aging that is continuing to progress.

Here's a video where I review a product that claims to remove all the issues I have of my face.

Listen as I let you know if it worked for me.

We all have that one night where we get no sleep. How it affects your day. How it changes your mood. How it affects the way you eat and what you consume (copious amounts of caffeine, much?).

I'm used to a day, here or there, of no sleep. That's the problem with being a thinker, and over thinking things, even the smallest things that no matter how many times I think it over and over again that it won't change the past, present, or future. A sad reality that has taken me years to accept. 

But it still doesn't stop my mind from the intense wandering until 30 minutes before my alarm clock goes off, to which it shuts down and I finally find dreamland. 

How unfair and cruel my mind can be.

I'm also used to having a couple days, in a row, of no sleep, thanks to said mind.

But after the third day of no sleep, my anxiety kicks in. I am more startled, I have a harder time falling asleep due to this startling. Any sound has my heart racing and putting me back at square one in my feeble attempts at rest. I am also restless and uneasy, wired and dizzy.

In this video (made yesterday, Friday, April 24) I had gone four nights without sleep. A whole 96 hours awake with only 12 hours of sleep. I tried sleeping in when I could. I really tried napping. And I wasn't successful. 

I had fallen into a deep sleep about an hour before I had to get ready for a dental visit. I wanted so bad to stay in bed. But I couldn't. This was a special dental visit that had to be made on this day, at this time. 

So come watch as I ramble on and on about more-or-less nothing, as you take a car ride with me to find a new dentist office in the middle of nowhere, so much so that my GPS couldn't even find it.

P.S. I finally got some sleep last night. I went to bed and DIDN'T MOVE until my alarm went off this morning. My head hit the pillow and within minutes, I was out. It was glorious. 

We have our little secrets, right?

Well here I share a few of mine.

Read below where I talk about one of my most embarrassing moments, a memory I couldn't remember for the video, and now I know why!

There's reasons why I suppress old memories!

But I promised I'd write it down for ya'll and so, here ya go.

As you can tell, I could not remember a most embarrassing memory. 

And I remember WHY I don't allow myself to remember past embarrassing memories after unearthing this one from the deepest realms of my mind. LOL

One day my two friends and I were over at another friend's house, jumping on her trampoline. We were playing "Crack The Egg"; where you sit criss-crossed, holding your feet with your hands. The object of the game is that if you're the "egg", you try to remain "unbroken" while your friends jump around you, trying to free your hands and feet. Once they've done that, you've lost. The quicker they can "crack" you, the more of a wimp you are.

My friend and I were both the "egg" while my other two friends jumped around us. I ended up with one free hand, my other friend still intact and we were both on our side, immovable. My friends were laughing about how my other "egg" friend's head was right up against my tush and so with my free hand, I tried to push her away and give us both some space. When I realized that no matter how great of effort my poor friend, who, God bless her had the determination to not break free from being an "egg" so she could win, decided having her face against my backside worth it, I lost it and laughed so hard I peed my pants (of course AFTER I had separated myself from her and jumped off the trampoline).

I was dubbed the name PeeBody for several years afterwards. 

I was out with a couple of friends when the subject of another friend came up.

"I haven't seen Sally in a while," the friend to my left says, "is she doing ok?"

Sally had recently confided in me things that I shared with no one. I knew the information given to me was of a sensitive nature and therefore, I, being a friend of hers that I want her to trust, considered how I would answer this question. I thought of saying, "I think she's just needing a break right now" or "She's probably been busy", as I didn't want to appear like I knew too much (as we all can't stand knowing that someone knows more information of another than you do, right?).

Before I could decide which answer was a better fit, the friend on my right (Mary) says loudly and confidently, "Honey, you don't want to know...."

The thoughts in my head came to a screeching halt as I look over at Mary. As far as I knew, Sally and Mary were not close. They knew each other, though. But I hardly believed Sally was sharing such sensitive information that she felt she could confide in me in, to someone she hardly knew.

That was when I asked, "Oh, did Sally tell you what was going on?"

"No," she answered, "But Sally is close to Jackie and Jackie told me."

I realized something that day. Something about Mary and Jackie that ultimately changed the person that I wanted to be.

I never wanted to be known as a busy body, or someone that people assume they can trust with sensitive matters, and go tell someone else about it. 

There's a reason why YOU are the person a friend turns to when they want to talk. It's because they feel they have a sense of comradery with YOU. That YOU are a soft place to land. That what YOU are being told, is safe within YOU.

There's a reason why they didn't tell your best friend Mary. There's a reason why they didn't tell any other person they may know. 

So why make someone's business someone else's? 

Watch as I talk a little more about gossip, how it affects you and those around you. And how you can avoid it and be the driving force to stop the spread of it.

*Names have been changed. Duh. 

Twenty-six bucks is the perfect price to pay for love. 

Welcome to our newest addition. Welcome home.

Pics below!

The other day I was looking at my closet, at the mass of clothes hanging there when I realized that I wear less than half of them regularly. Sure, there's a couple fancy shirts and dresses for that occasional fancy evening that comes once or twice a year but other than that, I have far too many clothes that stay unworn, unloved, and could be given to someone else who actually NEEDS them.

Here's how you can make the best out of ten pieces of clothing. I counted 35 outfits that I could make, could you count more?

Today many YouTubers have joined the #DearMe Youtube campaign to help everyone see that they are enough as they are.

Without viewing anyone's video, I decided to make one. I wanted it to be uninfluenced by the other YouTubers, I wanted it to be unscripted and come from within. What would I want the 15 year old me to know?

At 15 years old I remember laying in my room in torment. I felt so alone and so dark. I felt no light within me. I felt no emotion and felt imprisoned because of that. I remember wondering what in the world brought me to this place and wondered if I'd ever be happy again...or if I'd ever be able to EXIST the way I did again.

I reached up to the air above me, as though I attempted with every fiber of my being to grab hold of the ceiling that rested six feet above me and begged God to touch me, to heal me, to show me any sign. I remember begging for him to touch me, or for any sign, any sort of acknowledgement that He was there!

Nothing happened.

I felt at that moment that the only way I would know His existence and to be able to return to sanity, was if I left this earth.

It made sense at that time. There was no way out of the abyss I lingered within than that.

Fast forward 17 years to day.

So much has happened since that night. So many chapters of my life opened and closed and opened anew. Each chapter expanding my understanding more than the last about that time in my life.

I have a far greater understanding of what happened and why it did. Why I had such a tumultuous season in my life and at such a young age. Why I felt so alone, why I felt so forsaken.

I could go on for days. My understanding now is like an onion, with many layers, all bound together, only for me to truly know each part of it.

But I wanted to share a little of that onion with you.

So you love the item at the thrift store, it fits, but it's not the EXACT color you want?

There's two things you can do:

1. Dye it

2. Bleach it

Watch my solution to these pants that I thought I'd love and realized, I didn't!

Wanna know how to change your clothes with dye or tea? Visit Jane's post here!!

Re-Inventing Your Wardrobe

This is part one of two videos! Be on the lookout for tomorrow's video!

While not everyone who watches my videos reads my blog, I have figured that not everyone that reads my blog watches my videos!

So I'm saving you the hassle of reading my ramblings when you now can listen to them! You're welcome!

Mr Hunter now has what I had. It's interesting how he seems to have the same sickness, but other parts of the illness are more intense than others. While I have a mild cough, which is now rearing it's head after being sick for a week, he has started this sickness with a violent one. He got little sleep last night, ran a fever, and is feeling those aches and pains.

I am certain that I was coming off as a big faker this last week, complaining of tiredness, staying in bed most of the day, ditching out on our routine of watching Netflix every night, ignoring chores around the house even though once I was up I appeared, for the most part, just fine....only to come crashing down after a couple hours and crawling back into bed, in hopes of catching a few minutes sleep. I even left groceries in their plastic bags since Wednesday. If it didn't need to go in the fridge or freezer, I left them in their bags and this morning finally put them away.

Coming from an outside perspective I looked far more "lazy" than I did "sick".

The million dollar question is: Did you tell him, "I told you so"?

Yes, I did, in a non-verbal meany way by making him cancel his appointments, stay in bed, layer him in warm blankets, turned that blasted phone OFF, against his will, as that thing alarms him several times an hour and he jumps to answer it, give him medicine around the clock, get him whatever he needs and let me treat him like a baby. ;)

Or maybe you're a little of both, to which you're a NEUTRAL.

Here I go over the well-known tips as to how to tell if you are warm, cool, or neutral toned. According to my friend, Jane, who does professional draping to determine the best colors for you, two-thirds of people are neutral toned. 

For instance, I'm a neutral, but I lean more warm so I prefer to wear warm colors most of the time. I do have some cool greys that I'll wear, as well as the occasional black and I'll wear just about any color of red that's on the color wheel as that's my favorite color!

I will be starting a new series. I'm nervous to start it as I fear failure in execution, thanks to the inner anxiety girl, but in order for me to more forward in this series, I wanted to help you see if you're a cool or warm. 

And if you still don't know and are desirous to know if you're either of these and if you would also like to go further than that and know the true, best colors for you, contact Jane! She's the color genius, she's the professional, she's the kindest, warmest person I've met and you'll be happy with the results. 

Every now and then, say, every few months, I will scroll through my phone's gallery, usually with a child peering over my shoulders, looking at all the pictures I've taken, the videos where I captured a moment I didn't want to forget, and hilarious or inspirational quotes I've downloaded from all over the web...half the time moving my phone's from said child's eyes and clicking the back button as my form of humor may not compute, or be as innocent, as his/hers, while telling him/her that it's time to go do something productive before their brain could catch up long enough to ask what in the world it was that I was hiding from them.

I thought it would be fun to share these moments with you, to let you in on that little black, handheld device that I carry around in my back pocket, against my backside, or in the compartment in my purse next to where I hold my mace.

Here lies all my secrets. LOL, or LACK THEREOF.

Yeah, pretty self explanatory!

One of my favorite things in the world is a good, old fashioned, girl's night out. 

For those brief few hours we ladies get together and forget about the dishes that have been smelling up the kitchen. We forget about the dread we have come morning when we have to tackle everything we're putting off tonight to do...as well as the guilt that looms over us as we feel five pounds heavier because we ate that much in weight.

It's just moment in life where it seems like there is no time, there is no worry, we can just be us without the obligations that are calling our name. 

And a moment where there is food. A lot of it.

But that's besides the point of this video!

I wanted to show you that while wearing your simple day-to-day outfit that you can make it look like an outfit for the night out! And you can also make that outfit into many different looks with just a couple of accessories. 

I originally planned to show off two outfits but while filming, I found four! 

And as you can tell in the video, you don't need expensive accessories, or even brand new accessories. Be thrifty and frugal and you can look incredible, for pennies!

And below I took some closeups. I completely spaced on videoing closeups of the accessories until after I had fully edited the video. Some day I'll get it right! ;)

What I'm wearing, to which you'll see just how THRIFTY I am:

Shirt: Gift from Rosemary, Merona from Target

Pants: Old Navy Diva Skinny Jeans, dark blue, $25

Shoes: Converse/Chuck Taylors I got myself for Christmas 2013

Socks: LOL, I had to. Probably No Boundaries from Walmart.

Belt: Given to us years ago!

Earrings: Minicci from Payless Shoes

Knitted Sweater: GAP circa 2000ish

Scarf: From Katherine! From Target.

Pearl Necklace/Bracelet: Got at a yard sale

Wannabe Leather Jacket: ASHLEY by 26 International circa 2000ish

Cream- beaded Necklace: Walmart for $5 or $8

Chevron Bracelets: Birthday gift from another amazing friend.

My daughter has been eye-balling these Diamond Candles for a few months now. They're supposed to be the greatest candles ever, she says, because inside each candle is a diamond ring! And what are diamonds, folks??? 

So she saved her money, handed it over to me and I ordered one online. She HAD to get the Watermelon Wedge scent, from what other youtubers have stated, it is the best scent, and she HAD to get a gold ring with a PINK diamond, something she knew she couldn't control, but was hoping nonetheless! 

Finally it arrived, I called her while she was at the neighbor's house, and she ran home to tear open the box. Instantly the amazingly sweet, savory smell filled our nostrils before she even unwrapped it. 

But what touched my heart was when she said, "Hey Mom, do you think you could help me do a ring reveal for youtube?" 

"Sure sweetie," I told her, assuming she wanted that to be the start of her youtube channel, as she's been talking about starting one for a while now.

"...and can you post it on your channel? I want your viewers to see."

How could I resist? While Diamond Candles, even product reviews in general, have not been done on my channel, I was happy that my first experience doing so was with my beautiful daughter.

Watch and see what kind of ring she gets and what her thoughts are on this candle!